It seems disappointing myself is a constant in my life. I am the heaviest I have ever been (227 lbs) and am the most out-of-shape I think I can get. I was in the hospital last week. Woke up dizzy and couldn’t maintain balance for 2 days. Even now, 7 days later, I still feel as though I am in a fog.
The cause...?
Chiari? Maybe.
Fat? Definitely.
I got up this morning, walked the puppies, had a cup of coffee, looked myself dead in the eye and cried. Then... I got angry. I am walking a dangerous line right now, and I feel myself tilting. I need to right this ship before it sinks. Stabilize. I’m lazy and non-existent when it comes to my health. I need to change. Not for “now” - but forever.
So... I fumbled through a work-out I used to blast through. Well... saying “fumbled through” is too forgiving. I couldn’t even do the yoga poses. But I put on my cross-trainers and sports bra, and did what my body would allow for now.
I am giving myself another shot. One more.
Good day.
